This was it, the New York museum of modern art, five floors of paintings,drawings, sculptures and photographs for me to sink my teeth into. Boy were we in for a treat. After getting our tickets we got the elevator to the top floor so we could work our way down. We exited on the fifth floor and entered the first gallery with an open mind.
End of Broadcast I
This may initially appear abstract or generic, yet it is actually the enlarged pixel pattern of television static which can occur when there is no signal or because of censorship or other forceful restrictions.
This was literally the first piece that I saw and my initial thought was, well this just looks like a big untuned TV screen, I thought there must be more to it so I read the little description. Nope it actually is just enlarged TV static and apparently that makes it not generic and abstract. To me this does not signify censorship it signify so that you don’t know how to use a remote control.
More Than Melancholy
Unfortunatley the gallery had nothing to say about this other than its name.
The definition of melancholy “a feeling of passive sadness,typically with no obvious cause”
Well this does give me a feeling of sadness but the cause is fairly obvious. How is a beige rectangle with a white smudge in the corner hanging on the wall of this art museum. I’m pretty sure that I have actually improved it with my reflection in the photo.
Man Heroic and Sublime
Its most dramatic feature was its shear size, the artist made large pictures that were intended to be seen from a short distance.
Hovis: “It’s most dramatic feature is its shear size” that’s basically saying this is in the gallery because look how big it is! Looking at this up close or from a distance does not change the fact that it’s just a big red rectangle.
The Song of Love
By subverting the the logical presence of objects the artist created metaphysics, representations of what lies beyond the physical world.
This is a nonsense painting but I could forgive it for that, I quite like the giant rubber glove, but as for claiming to be a representation of beyond the physical world you’ve lost me. When you die you will be greeted by a giant pink rubber glove a statue’s head and a big green ball, I’ve not seen many religions pushing this view of an afterlife.
Why Not Sneeze Rose Selavy?
In Advance of the Broken Arm
What. The. Hell.
In advance of the broken arm is the name of the snow shovel hanging from the ceiling, the only way I could justify this being in a museum was if it was the snow shovel the scary but ultimately nice guy uses in home alone.
The imaginatively named bicycle wheel is the wheel stuck in a stoll
Why not sneeze is a small cage filled with sugar cubes with a cuttle fish stuck in it.
This is madness, it’s clearly a bunch of junk right? Plus if New York gets hit by a big snow storm people are going to be pissed they can’t reach the shovel.
While the painting is abstract it’s starting point was nature, which the artist set out not to describe but to paint “what it leaves me with”
Step 1: Buy a big canvas and several different coloured paints
Step 2: Open all of the paints and place them and the canvas on the floor
Step 3: Leave a toddler in the room for an hour
Step 4: Hang your “artwork” in the MoMA
Primary Light Group: Red, Green, Blue
“There is no hierarchy. There is no ambiguity. There is no illusion.
What is going on here then. There is a red a green and a blue border so I suppose they have nailed the title but that’s literally all there is, it’s literally three blank canvasses, I think this is the most ridiculous thing in the MoMA/ any art museum. There is no hierarchy. There is no ambiguity. There is no illusion. There is no art.
Now to be fair not everything was “artsy” there was also some rather impressive stuff as well
Monet’s Warter Lilly’s
Van Gogh’s Starry Night
after some of the more modern art on display these very famous enough paintings stood up and justified their fame very well.
This was one of both Lucie and my favourite paintings, it’s depicting a hell like underworld and I think it does a pretty good job of creating a foreboding feeling. (I dont really know how to write a positive review)
Just before we left we had a quick stroll around the buildings garden where we were treated by a series of strange noises that almost sounded like a bird squarking in pain, the sounds continued and we questioned each other as to what it was, we soon discovered it was in fact another art piece called Birdcalls and the sound was in fact a woman shouting out the names of famous artists but in the style of a birdcall. It was bizarre because the garden was very nice and relaxed and this had the effect of listened to a calming sounds of the ocean CD that was complete with the sound of hungry seagulls. As we left the MoMA I was left to think once again that the world of art definitely operates in a realm that I do not understand.